Transitions

Step one happened this year, on the last full day of spring, I finally noticed everything coming apart. I only admitted my reaction to one friend. Step two I took on the first day of summer, it meant asking for help (oh, how we men hate that!). But I managed it. Steps 3, 4 and 5 today—I went public and probably burned a bridge behind me. And I'm in a free falling, full-blown transition. I spent years trying to plan this, but now it's out of control. It happened only because I acted and forgot all about planning. Tonight I resisted the master procrastinator's (oops, I meant planner's) usual move. It goes like this—"Jim, pick up a book and read about it and then we'll put a plan together." I don't think transitions ever happen that way. They get put off, that's all.

I can't really define it, but all the transitions in my life started with an action, not a plan. Where will it take me and what will I make of it? I spoke to a friend of 40 years about this quietly over the weekend before going public and tonight I remembered he was around for another one of those moments. We both jumped into something no one really expected of either of us, and off we went—joining a group of two dozen—it was totally out of character, unplanned and magnificent. We never dreamed we'd wind up here in a sort of paradise, but I think that transition had a hand in getting us here.

Another transition or two happened in between, mostly done without a plan in mind, and on short notice. I married a young woman after perhaps a half dozen dates (we lived about 300 miles apart at the time of the first Arab oil embargo. Gas was being rationed to gas stations, so they shortened their hours, and I was nearly stranded a couple of times). Anyway, we had limited opportunities to spend time together. With that forced compression weighing on us, we decided we loved each other, not exactly sure why, but we were convinced we could make a go of it—so we jumped in and started swimming. We moved to the Southeast, on my impulse, and over her objections, but it worked out and landed us here. Now, I've jumped into the next phase. But it wasn't logical or planned—I just did it. Look out.