Christopher McDonald, who plays Tommy Jefferson on the TV series Harry's Law,uttered those words on an episode I watched the other night. It's not a program I watch much, but his words struck a chord with me. His point, aimed squarely at people in their 50's and beyond, is that when you're in the midst of things in your current occupation, feeling stressed and not having much fun, you need to remember to savor this moment.
Soon enough, I will be the guy who used to be me. But today, I am in the middle of it, in the game, and I don't want to wake up 15 years from now asking why didn't I really make it fun, live in the moment and savor it? So when challenges are laid before you, jump in and have some fun. It won't last forever, but you might just miss it when the ride is over.
The real gift is to learn to apply that thinking and habit to every new challenge you run across, whether it's plying your present trade or tackling something new in your second half of life. Have fun making the attempt and don't focus on the stress or the difficulty. Savor the lessons you learn and thank God you got off your behind and reached for your dream, whatever it is.
But, what if you take on some kind of ordinary work to pile up a little money to visit someplace you always wanted to take? Do you just put up with it, or do you look through the prism of savoring all of it? If you have learned the gift of habitually savoring it, you won't be wasting time, you will be full of the present, on the verge of arriving at that destination you set out for when you tackled the work to get there.
So, beyond thinking it, how do I make this a part of me? What is my normal reaction to the stressors in my world? Worry, frowning at the world, snapping at people around me, feeling the urge to walk out? What have I taught myself to do about these reactions? Some are good (taking a deep breath, taking a walk, getting a good night's sleep, getting some exercise), some less so (having a good stiff drink--or two, blaming others, escaping into some other wasteful activity, tears). What if I try a twist on the expression I have used sarcastically in times of stress--"Are we having fun yet?" Having fun is another way to savor the good and the bad, to make what's heavy and dragging you down just part of the experience today, because tomorrow, we could be yesterday.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Friday, October 7, 2011
Friday at Five
Have I mentioned I work from home? :>) Now stop that, it really doesn't become you. It's not all the time, and I travel a great deal, so there is some compensating aspect to the overall picture. It's not all fun. Let's have a show of hands from all of you who think travel (on business, mind you) is a lot of fun. Not these days. But let's get back to the work-at-home experience.
With no interruptions from people showing up at the door, or stopping to chat at the coffee pot, you can get swallowed up by work. Happened to me today--I started writing an outline for a little talk I have to give soon, and the next time I looked at my watch the day was almost gone. It gives me pause, when things like that happen. What's going to engage my attention like that in a few years? Reading a book? Playing a word game? Not likely.
I don't find myself looking forward to the day when I don't remember what day it is. Life has had a shape for all these years that I have been working. I once thought working from home would be a form of transition to my second half of life. I would get used to a life without commuting (it's true I have, but it has been replaced by travel to some extent and travel doesn't have the rhythm that commuting has--books on tape for the drive or a favorite radio show at drive time). When I commuted 60 miles eah way, I could have those things. when I took a bus downtown, I did homework for graduate school. I haven't been able to make travel work out that way.
Anyway, I missed commuting in a few small ways, but having the time back overwhelmed those misgivings. The thing is I have found I could get absorbed just as easily as when I was in the office, and I had fewer interruptions. So what happens is that Friday at Five sneaks up on you. How do I get that kind of absorption in my life after I leave the first half?
With no interruptions from people showing up at the door, or stopping to chat at the coffee pot, you can get swallowed up by work. Happened to me today--I started writing an outline for a little talk I have to give soon, and the next time I looked at my watch the day was almost gone. It gives me pause, when things like that happen. What's going to engage my attention like that in a few years? Reading a book? Playing a word game? Not likely.
I don't find myself looking forward to the day when I don't remember what day it is. Life has had a shape for all these years that I have been working. I once thought working from home would be a form of transition to my second half of life. I would get used to a life without commuting (it's true I have, but it has been replaced by travel to some extent and travel doesn't have the rhythm that commuting has--books on tape for the drive or a favorite radio show at drive time). When I commuted 60 miles eah way, I could have those things. when I took a bus downtown, I did homework for graduate school. I haven't been able to make travel work out that way.
Anyway, I missed commuting in a few small ways, but having the time back overwhelmed those misgivings. The thing is I have found I could get absorbed just as easily as when I was in the office, and I had fewer interruptions. So what happens is that Friday at Five sneaks up on you. How do I get that kind of absorption in my life after I leave the first half?
Thursday, October 6, 2011
A Declaration of War
Some of us have seen Caddyshack a few too many times, but Bill Murray just keeps me coming back (Later, he made an unforgettable tribute to coming back in Groundhog Day, but that's another story). Back to Caddyshack and Bill Murray's lunatic groundskeeper, you will remember his campaign against the groundhogs at the Country Club. In the end, he blows up half the golf course, yet fails to get his man, er, groundhog.
Well, with that in mind, I ignored the invasion of a groundhog in my yard the first spring after we moved in. I knew I did not have the time to do battle. By midsummer he had disappeared, driven further underground by the heat? Only to return in the Fall, By Spring, he had invited his whole family to move in, and I started to reconsider peaceful co-existence as a policy of governance in my yard. I learned that they feed off lawn insects, so I treated the lawn for bugs a couple of times, it couldn't hurt.
In the mean time, I took to checking the lawn and garden aisles at Lowe's for weapons in my border skirmishes. I learned about the small poison pellets. You used the cone-shaped plastic bottle the pellets came in to create access to a tunnel, then dropped in a few pellets. Doing this, you could imagine your adversaries dropping dead as they feverishly burrowed around looking for a bug to take the awful taste out of their mouths. It's more pleasant than hand-to-hand combat with the little critters. In the end no real deterrence came as a result. The groundhogs were thriving.
I saw, but just didn't feel I wanted to try, the traps. A spring-loaded kind of mechanism you are supposed to push into one of the tunnels and catch the enemy walking along unsuspecting---and wham, the steel trap chops him in two. A yard warrior can then count coup over his fallen enemy when he pulls the trap from the ground.
"Wouldn't work for me," I said, I now had a whole tribe living under my lawn. "Knocking off one or two just won't cut it, I need a weapon of mass destruction." This Spring, I invested several hundred dollars in some sod (along with several hundred dollars a month in water to get it to stay alive. My yard has looked fine all summer, but the weather is cooling, and the early signs are that Groundhog Nation has returned. The good news is I have declared war with a modern weapon at my disposal. So, this afternoon I put on my best Bill Murray camo outfit and deployed my secret weapons--SONIC SPIKES. They are solar-powered, giant spikes that emit sonic pulses that are probably ear-splitting to groundhogs. They are said to drive out the enemy within 7 to 14 days. Stay tuned--War has been declared.
Well, with that in mind, I ignored the invasion of a groundhog in my yard the first spring after we moved in. I knew I did not have the time to do battle. By midsummer he had disappeared, driven further underground by the heat? Only to return in the Fall, By Spring, he had invited his whole family to move in, and I started to reconsider peaceful co-existence as a policy of governance in my yard. I learned that they feed off lawn insects, so I treated the lawn for bugs a couple of times, it couldn't hurt.
In the mean time, I took to checking the lawn and garden aisles at Lowe's for weapons in my border skirmishes. I learned about the small poison pellets. You used the cone-shaped plastic bottle the pellets came in to create access to a tunnel, then dropped in a few pellets. Doing this, you could imagine your adversaries dropping dead as they feverishly burrowed around looking for a bug to take the awful taste out of their mouths. It's more pleasant than hand-to-hand combat with the little critters. In the end no real deterrence came as a result. The groundhogs were thriving.
I saw, but just didn't feel I wanted to try, the traps. A spring-loaded kind of mechanism you are supposed to push into one of the tunnels and catch the enemy walking along unsuspecting---and wham, the steel trap chops him in two. A yard warrior can then count coup over his fallen enemy when he pulls the trap from the ground.
"Wouldn't work for me," I said, I now had a whole tribe living under my lawn. "Knocking off one or two just won't cut it, I need a weapon of mass destruction." This Spring, I invested several hundred dollars in some sod (along with several hundred dollars a month in water to get it to stay alive. My yard has looked fine all summer, but the weather is cooling, and the early signs are that Groundhog Nation has returned. The good news is I have declared war with a modern weapon at my disposal. So, this afternoon I put on my best Bill Murray camo outfit and deployed my secret weapons--SONIC SPIKES. They are solar-powered, giant spikes that emit sonic pulses that are probably ear-splitting to groundhogs. They are said to drive out the enemy within 7 to 14 days. Stay tuned--War has been declared.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
It's About the Beach
I worked from home today, and thank heavens! I would have missed the visit from the Census Bureau, and our federal government would have had to spend another several hundred dollars it doesn't have to complete its American Community Survey. It seems the "U.S. Census Bureau chose my address, not me personally, as part of a randomly selected sample." I was "required by U.S. law to respond to this survey."
Yes, a U.S. Census Bureau worker appeared at my door and handed me a letter to this effect. I had twice received forms in the mail with a notation in bold print, all caps, "YOUR RESPONSE IS REQUIRED BY LAW. I didn't ignore them exactly, I picked the second edition up and put it in my computer bag and carried it to Manitowoc, Wisconsin and twice to Rockford, Illinois. I had picked it out of my computer bag the day before, winced and told myself--"You have to put this on your to-do list, and get it done, this week, at least."
But my wife came home and said, "can you take an hour off and walk on the beach with me? I need the exercise." So we drove over, parked the car and walked past the beach grill and bar to our walk. After our 45 minutes on the beach, as we walked past the grill, we decided to stop for a grilled grouper sandwich. Sitting in the afternoon sun on a crisp October afternoon, I was all about the beach. By the time we arrived home, my to-do list was not in the picture. The next morning, shortly after I had finished answering my emails and a couple of expense reports (and updating that to-do list), here was the U.S. government at my door, in the person of a pleasant middle-aged woman with her hair tied up in an officious-looking bun handing me a letter. The letter went on "to emphasize that any information you give our representative will be kept confidential. By law, the Census Bureau cannot publish or release to anyone any information that would identify you or your household." Whew!
Her first question--"do you remember getting two letters in the mail?" After apologizing profusely, I invited her in and answered a few questions. As she left, I apologized again. She just said, "oh, if it weren't for this, I might not have a job anyway." So, there it is, in miniature, the federal deficit and I am in the middle of it. It's all about the beach.
Yes, a U.S. Census Bureau worker appeared at my door and handed me a letter to this effect. I had twice received forms in the mail with a notation in bold print, all caps, "YOUR RESPONSE IS REQUIRED BY LAW. I didn't ignore them exactly, I picked the second edition up and put it in my computer bag and carried it to Manitowoc, Wisconsin and twice to Rockford, Illinois. I had picked it out of my computer bag the day before, winced and told myself--"You have to put this on your to-do list, and get it done, this week, at least."
But my wife came home and said, "can you take an hour off and walk on the beach with me? I need the exercise." So we drove over, parked the car and walked past the beach grill and bar to our walk. After our 45 minutes on the beach, as we walked past the grill, we decided to stop for a grilled grouper sandwich. Sitting in the afternoon sun on a crisp October afternoon, I was all about the beach. By the time we arrived home, my to-do list was not in the picture. The next morning, shortly after I had finished answering my emails and a couple of expense reports (and updating that to-do list), here was the U.S. government at my door, in the person of a pleasant middle-aged woman with her hair tied up in an officious-looking bun handing me a letter. The letter went on "to emphasize that any information you give our representative will be kept confidential. By law, the Census Bureau cannot publish or release to anyone any information that would identify you or your household." Whew!
Her first question--"do you remember getting two letters in the mail?" After apologizing profusely, I invited her in and answered a few questions. As she left, I apologized again. She just said, "oh, if it weren't for this, I might not have a job anyway." So, there it is, in miniature, the federal deficit and I am in the middle of it. It's all about the beach.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Craig's List and Today's Economy
Did you see the USA Today article today about desperately unemployed advertising services via the free classifieds on Craig's List. It's almost like the roadside "will work for food" sign holders. A step above, but just another data point on how upside-down our world has become. USA Today calls the free classifieds a portal into the misery of people trying to find jobs, especially the people approaching three years without a regular job. These are people willing to do an sort of work or odd job for money, and they have turned to Craig's list to make contact.
I've written before about how many jobs are filled each month, even in these times of no job growth. Some number of people are leaving jobs and being replaced, even in the worst of times. Don't believe me? Go to the Job Openings and Labor Turnover report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and see for yourself, Even in the worst months of this recession, there are literally millions of jobs available. But, those jobs are not available to the long-term unemployed and to those who failed to graduate from high school.
Feel sorry for yourself, go read this article Copy and paste he following into your web browser:
http://www.usatoday.com/money/economy/story/2011-10-03/jobs-craigslist-unemployed-economy-classified-ads/50647040/1
These are some folks that need work to feed themselves and their families. instead of just feeling sorry for themselves, they are doing something. You can't help but admire them.
I've written before about how many jobs are filled each month, even in these times of no job growth. Some number of people are leaving jobs and being replaced, even in the worst of times. Don't believe me? Go to the Job Openings and Labor Turnover report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and see for yourself, Even in the worst months of this recession, there are literally millions of jobs available. But, those jobs are not available to the long-term unemployed and to those who failed to graduate from high school.
Feel sorry for yourself, go read this article Copy and paste he following into your web browser:
http://www.usatoday.com/money/economy/story/2011-10-03/jobs-craigslist-unemployed-economy-classified-ads/50647040/1
These are some folks that need work to feed themselves and their families. instead of just feeling sorry for themselves, they are doing something. You can't help but admire them.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Antebellum Homes, Fried Shrimp and Convertible Rides
Yesterday we drove the 2-seater convertible up to Beaufort, SC to see the Beaufort Shrimp Fest. It was the first cool sunny day of Fall, and it was October first. the only problem--they just invited too many people. Everybody and his uncle was there. Getting to a booth to have some shrimp looked like an ordeal. We walked through the park and it was shoulder-to-shoulder all the way. People would just stop to talk to someone or decide on a booth to try and everything would grind to a halt. There was no way around them. You just had to stand there. Now I like shrimp well enough and there was the promise of some cold beer to wash it down. The waterfront has a fine view of the Beaufort River (which isn't a river at all, it is a tidal strait, full of Atlantic seawater, plain and simple. More about that later). But it was a little ridiculous. We toured a shrimp boat, but it was packed with people and you could hardly get near the boat's captain, who was there to explain a little about a shrimper's life. In short, the fest was trying our patience.
Then we saw it--The Prince of Tides--a tour boat with a dozen or so people sitting on the benches taking it all in from offshore. We went and got some tickets, and I bought a beer and we were on board for the 90 minute tour of the river. I had to share the beer because we could not find a place in that crowd to buy herself a soda.
We had a fine boat ride, we saw many of the antebellum homes from the ocean side, heard about The Great Skeedaddle-when the city's residents all ran away when the Union forces overwhelmed the fort at St. Helena Island and sailed in to occupy the City of Beaufort. With the residents gone, the Union army turned many of these homes into hospitals as many as 14 were hospitals. In post-bellum days, Beaufort boomed. Because of the Union occupation it was largely intact, and it was a center for all sorts of trade and exports of farm products. Most all of that was wiped out when the Great Storm of 1893 submerged nearly all of South Carolina.
Soon we ran out of land and homes to talk about and our crew turned to the lively eco-system of the Beaufort River. We saw both the top and bottom of the food chain. The top of the food chain are the dolphins, which consume 25 lbs of fish daily. At the bottom are the microbes that live on the detritus from seasonal comings and goings of spartina grass that grows on the tidal waters.
Later, we went to the Wren, a restaurant with unique interior design and an in-between menu for people who (like us) are too late for lunch and too early for dinner. It was tasty. All in all, a very special day.
Then we saw it--The Prince of Tides--a tour boat with a dozen or so people sitting on the benches taking it all in from offshore. We went and got some tickets, and I bought a beer and we were on board for the 90 minute tour of the river. I had to share the beer because we could not find a place in that crowd to buy herself a soda.
We had a fine boat ride, we saw many of the antebellum homes from the ocean side, heard about The Great Skeedaddle-when the city's residents all ran away when the Union forces overwhelmed the fort at St. Helena Island and sailed in to occupy the City of Beaufort. With the residents gone, the Union army turned many of these homes into hospitals as many as 14 were hospitals. In post-bellum days, Beaufort boomed. Because of the Union occupation it was largely intact, and it was a center for all sorts of trade and exports of farm products. Most all of that was wiped out when the Great Storm of 1893 submerged nearly all of South Carolina.
Soon we ran out of land and homes to talk about and our crew turned to the lively eco-system of the Beaufort River. We saw both the top and bottom of the food chain. The top of the food chain are the dolphins, which consume 25 lbs of fish daily. At the bottom are the microbes that live on the detritus from seasonal comings and goings of spartina grass that grows on the tidal waters.
Later, we went to the Wren, a restaurant with unique interior design and an in-between menu for people who (like us) are too late for lunch and too early for dinner. It was tasty. All in all, a very special day.
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