On Being Crabby

Someone told me (for the 2nd day in a row) I was being crabby. Having denied it, I was informed I "must not even know what crabbiness is." I looked it up, and found several definitions, synonyms, and even translations, e.g., Grincheux is the French word for crabby (Oh, Dr. Seuss, I never knew your secret--Grinch was not a made-up word). Grouchy, ill-tempered, grumpy are words commonly found in the definition. I find none of the above that fit, especially the French one. Even if it were so, two days in a row is nowhere near the record (see the world record holder below)

Even so, I have found this little writing space a perfect antidote to lots of pains and other puzzles. Thus I sat down here to explore crabby, just in case herself was correct to label me crabby. So far, the best thing I learned just nosing around to see if I was even close to crabby myself is this--the best way to deal with being crabby is to act as if you aren't,


It turns out there is brain science behind this. I am not making this up, but it has been proven that humans are hard-wired, so to speak, to respond to a smile with a smile; to respond to a frown with something less than pleasant; to crying with a congruent look of sadness and an offer of sympathy.

Secondly, the brain tends to store memories by emotion, so when you let a crabby emotion run its course, it is bound to stir up memories of other times you have been crabby and soon your crabbiness is spiraling even higher--or is it lower? Probably depends on whether it is depressed-crabby (downward) or stressed-crabby (upward). Now, if you act as if you aren't crabby, you don't dredge up more memories of other crabbiness.

 

Now, this is me, acting as if I am not crabby. I'm reminded of the story about the power of suggestion that went something like this, the doctor tells you to take some medicine or other, but cautions you that it will only work if you don't think of monkeys while you drink it. How in the world do you not think of a monkey without telling yourself "I am not going to think of a monkey"—which means you are thinking of a monkey? So, I'm sitting here not thinking about not being crabby….It's stopped raining, think I'll just go for a walk.