Dancing in the Dark

Learning to dance seems so important to the amateurs on "Dancing with the Stars." I am starting to worry about one of those distant promises I may have made--I think I may have said I would take dancing lessons in my second half of life. It seemed like a long way into the distant mists of time--out there somewhere. But I just had another birthday, and there's a "6" in my number somewhere. It means that a certain person will be reminding me of a conversation (maybe more than one, I really don't recall) we once had about ballroom or shag or something-or-another lessons. I have never been described as graceful, but I can ice skate, and I did it well enough to play hockey for five or six years. In fact, I think on my first date I took a girl ice-skating. It didn't last, I was a way better skater than she was.

But I digress--I never made a varsity team in any sport but football, and, trust me, football in 8th grade required little grace of a lineman or even a linebacker. So, how do I learn to dance? On the above-mentioned TV show, it looks like a full-time job. How do I make any progress taking a few lessons? Is it really that hard? If it is as hard as yoga, I am going to need a lot of encouragement.

The first obstacle will be within me. I know I am self-conscious when I try to learn dance steps. Dancing in my teen years was sort of formless anyway, so doing it wrong would be hard for anyone to tell. But these lessons imply that there really is a right way to do a dance. That also means people will quickly notice I don't know what I am doing.

Another issue will be my tendency to think too much. Whilst my partner is on to the next move I will be thinking--"OK, now i take 2 steps back with my left and one forward...OK..let's go.." At that point my dance partner will be stopped, waiting for me to move, etc., etc. I am over-thinking it right now, aren't I?

Then, there's the left from right thing. She swears I always want to go left when everyone else goes right, probably because I am partly left-handed. I write left-handed, throw right-handed, and kick right-footed. I also eat left-handed and play ping-pong left-handed.

But, maybe what I need is protection. The eyes I worried about seeing my awkward steps, what if.... I know what to do, take lessons and practice in the dark--no one will see the missteps, except herself, but I have her number anyway. So--it will be dancing in the dark.